June 26th, 2002

HTOC

If I Could Draw....

*clears throat*


If I could draw
I would draw you a picture
Of a place we could live
And you would hold it to the mirror
To read the words I wrote backwards
And you would pin it to the wall
Because you'd think it was cute
And you'd think I was cute

And I'd drive to your house
'Cause you live far away
And we'd sit on your couch
You'd have so much to say

And we'd listen to some chill tunes
As we talked about the bands
That sang all the chill tunes
That we'd listen to all night

And I'd put up my fingers and yell "Rock n Roll" for you
And you'd laugh as I played my wicked air guitar
And I'd talk about the band and say "Their bass player is good"
And you'd mention how much you liked the sound of the drums

And we'd kiss 'cause we'd know that that we're both dying fast
But I really can't draw so none of this will work
  • Current Music
    Modest Mouse
HTOC

The Meeting

HIM: You're a lot prettier than you probably get credit for
HER: I'm also a lesbian
HIM: Regardless, my comment still stands
HER: Well great, I feel much better about myself now
HIM: Look, I was just trying...
HER: And just what the hell do you mean "Get credit for"? That's more of an insult than a compliment.
HIM: What I meant was that most people probably don't take a long enough glance to realize how beautiful you really are.
HER: Oh, and you did?
HIM: Well...yes
HER: Well, thanks then...I guess. But that's a fucked up way to hit on a girl
HIM: It seems I shot the wrong arrow at the wrong target
HER: Actually, I was just kidding about the lesbian part
HIM: Ha! Why exactly, if I may ask?
HER: Most guys are sleazy assholes, so I use it to get them away from me, and with the way I dress, most of them believe it.
HIM: Well, I hate to tell you but it doesn't work. I'm still here.
HER: If I tell you I have herpes will you leave?
HIM: Who said I was in it for the sex
HER: All guys are looking for sex.
HIM: Well, can you blame us? Girls...you for example, walk around looking rather hot.
HER: Oh, so I've moved from "pretty" to "hot" now?
HIM: A little from column A, a little from Column B...

HER BOYFRIEND: Hey, just who in the hell is this guy?

(much pummeling)

-The End-